Attention all fellow junk food junkies: I may have just found the one, the only, the Holy Grail, the SWEET MOTHER of all sweet junk foods - MCDONALD'S APPLE PIE.
What's that I hear? You asking me what this so-called pie can do for your junkiness? I'll tell you what this baby can do!
One. The pastry. Golden brown biscuit that bites off into a heavenly dream of crisp, crumbling chunks so tantalising you know that it could only have been achieved by a company that had 50, that's right the big FIVE-O, years of perfecting just that right balance of fat and oil to make one incredibly lustful pastry. Mm-mmm!
Two. The filling. Ah the good ol' pipin' hot stuff. Now lookie here Mary Jane this ain't no ordinary pipin' hot stuff - this is some real premium choice Appley Goodness™ we're talking 'bout here Missy. Lovingly grown and nurtured, tenderly plucked and skinned and cored, and then mechanically processed into bite-sized cascades of the finest orgasm by apple known to man. If this doesn't send thrills of delight up and down your tastebuds, you must be one limp, cold fish ma'am. Uhuh.
Three. The packaging. It's subconscious. It's subliminal. It's sexay. Witness the sensuous curves of the box. Observe the appealing and appeasing greens and yellows of the box that are such a delight unto the eyes and a feast for the senses. Could such Appley Goodness™ be showcased in any more opulent finery such as this? No sirreebob!
So there you have it folks - a slice of paradise available to you at your nearest McDonald's for only A$1.75. Is that a bargain, or is that a bargain. Now that's what I call simply to die for.
Note to self: Clinical studies have shown that, when exposed to boring lecture notes, copious amounts of homework, anxiety from impending examinations and gruel from the college dining hall, the typical poor and starving university student may experience bouts of mass hallucination and the general misperception that anything from fast food outlets may be constituted as rapture.
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http://www.vogue.com.au/forums/showthread.php?t=87825
2 comments:
Talk about to die for.
When I feel like inching myself closer to a heart attack, a McD Apple Pie is my first choice!
It's not secret, they are rather tasty in a processed, fat laden, piping hot stress relieving goodness kind of way.
LOL! Why does it strike me, like a bolt of lightning, as an infomercial complete with a testimony?
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